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Everybody enjoys watching a girl walk by, especially when she's got the kind of eeeee-normous whoppers that arrive ten minutes before the rest of her.... Both sexes enjoy watching, but for some reason they don't seem to look at them in quite the same way. If we didn't know better, we'd almost say those two skinny lizzies sitting on the curb are jealous of that ordinary homework-loving teen with glasses. Just because she's got twice as much tit as both of them put together? Who'd have thought women could be so shallow! Right, here comes another one! Let's try it again, girls, and this time show a little appreciation, okay? |
| She's nice and slim; you couldn't really call this one skinny....
She's the same age as the rest of you.... She hasn't got a vast bust, just a plump, bouncy pair of grapefruit, neatly tied up in a knotted shirt.... And she doesn't sit at home slaving over her homework, that interesting shirt shows she's campaigning for a Nature Conservancy project — so she's the one who's supposed to be Green, not you lot. So behave! |
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"We're not green with envy!" "We're only trying to read what "But it ain't fair! My bestest friend "It ain't fair! My bestest friend "Don't tell Helga I said that about "Don't tell Heidi what I said, "She's just a horrible fat cow!" "They'll be dangling round "We hope." |
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But, in case you hadn't noticed, boys aren't like that....
Let's study their reaction to the next victim. Here she comes, now. Fashionably bare belly, invisible bra straps. As big as the red one, but not quite so pointy. |
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See? No disapproving glares from the boys... No bitchiness.... Boys don't pass judgement. Call them old-fashioned, but if a girl's breasts are really much too big, boys just shrug their shoulders and simply say.... |
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"Hey, Miss Concorde! "Her tits are even bigger "Give us a smile, lover!" "C'mon, you know you "Hey, babe, what's that "She looked, she looked!" "She fancies me, "You wanna swop shirts
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| See the difference?
With boys, you don't get all those negative, disrespectful comments.... |
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Talking of which, whenever you see a real gorgeous girl walking down the street, why does she always have a right horror story tagging along beside her? "If you and your little friend are gonna "Hey, I'm a famous glamour "Yeah, it's called Titanic!" "Get it? Tit-anic...?" "She ain't got no sense of humour. "Are them things all your own, or
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So there's your answer. Boys are more original thinkers. And they're so supportive. Talking of which.... "Do you need a hand with those?" As if one hand would be anywhere near enough. If you have one spare hand and you fancy a fistful of foxes just like these all to yourself, every week — and you know you do — what you need is a Candid Ding Dongs subscription. |
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"Why can't they just show a little modesty? Nice girls like us don't prance around sticking out our chests...." |
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