Long Dong Silver
by Hungry Guy (hungry@stoolmail.zzn.com or hungryguy@literotica.org)
(MF M/F WM WF Mpov 1st oral anal cons)

Foreword:  This is a work of fiction.  None of the people in this 
story are real.  None of these events ever happened.  This story is 
nothing more than words that came from my imagination.  Any 
similarity to any real people, places, or events is purely 

Operators of erotic story web sites, whether free or fee-based, have 
my permission to post my stories for public reading, provided that 
credit is given to "Hungry Guy" (hungry@stoolmail.zzn.com or 
hungryguy@literotica.org) as the author, and as long as you don't 
make changes other than fixing typos.  Even beware of fixing typos, 
for I occasionally use local slang and dialects that may be flagged 
by your spell checker.  Thanks.


    John Silver had a long dong.  I mean he had a _really_ long dong!  
The result of a genetic birth defect, it was over 30' long!  He 
wrapped it around his body, up his chest and back down again, several 
times, like a spool of wire.  He wore tight-fitting underwear to hold 
it in place.  He avoided erotic thoughts and fantasies in public, for 
he bulged out like the Michelin Man whenever he did.  He had 
occasionally considered getting it surgically shortened to, say, a 
more manageable 12 to 15 inches, but the idea of _shortening_ one's 
cock seemed, well, bizarre.

    Despite his gift, he had never been laid.  He had never had the 
guts to make an advance toward a woman, fearing her reaction when 
things got intimate.  

    He even went so far to get into a freelance writing career so 
that he could work from home and not have to go to a 9-to-5 job.  

    However, that didn't mean he stayed homebound his whole life.  
One Friday night, he was in his neighborhood watering hole.  He never 
went there looking to get lucky -- he actually avoided women whom he 
caught checking him out from a distance.  

    He had just finished his beer and had gone to the men's room.  As 
he came out, a woman ambushed him by the door and asked, "Is it true 
that you don't like women?"

    "Uhm, huh?" is all that he could say.  Checking her out, she was 
really cute.  She was a redhead with short straight hair and big 
brown eyes, and she was a little shorter than he was.  She looked hot 
in a plain white blouse and tight jeans.  

    "I've been watching you," she went on, "and I can tell you're not 

    "I, er, well," he continued his end of the dialog.

    "So what's your story?" she persisted.

    "I, uhm," he continued keeping the discourse alive.

    "Listen, I'm an egalitarian girl.  Why don't you buy me a drink, 
and I'll buy you one?  Deal?"

    "I guess so," he replied his first coherent statement to her.

    "Good," she answered putting her arm around his waist, then 
shrieked, "Oh my!"

    Every head at the bar turned at her outburst.

    Feeling his face turn beet-red, he answered, "It's nothing.  I -- 
uhm -- excuse me," and pulled away from her to leave.

    "Oh no!  You're not going anywhere until you tell me what that 
is!"  She rubbed her hand up his back, under his arms, and down his 
chest.  Despite his best efforts, he got so hard, and felt himself 
inflating like the Michelin Man.  He knew that she felt it too.

    "Oh!  My!  God!" she stepped back grabbing his arm.

    "I'm -- I'm -- I'm sorry," he stammered and tried to pull away 
from her again.

    "I don't think you have anything to be sorry for; except for 
hiding from me these past few weeks that I've seen you in here and 
you've ignored me."

    "Please," he begged, "I don't mean to be rude, but I think I 
should go now."

    "Fine with me!" she answered.  Without releasing his arm, she 
reached for a coat on a table by the men's room door.  "My coat's 
right here.  Let's go!  By the way, my name's Kim."

    "Nice to meet you, Kim.  I'm John."  Resigned to his predicament, 
and even slightly elated to be going home with a woman for the first 
time in his life, he escorted Kim out of the bar to his car.  He 
opened the door for her and helped her in, then got in the driver's 
side.  John was hard the whole way home being that Kim couldn't keep 
her hands off him.  

    At one point, she said to him in the car, "Please understand, 
John, that I don't normally do this."

    "Do what?" he asked.

    "You know -- go home with guys I just met."

    "Yeah, I understand," he answered.

    "I'm sure you do," she replied with a grin. 

    Once up in his apartment, she really turned on the aggression.  
"Want me to show you around?" he asked. 

    "I just want you to show me what you got under there!" she 
answered still pawing and kneading his chest.

    He led her into his bedroom, and took off his denim shirt.  His 
undershirt looked like a flimsy tarp over a wound up coil of hose. 

    "Don't stop now!" she urged.

    He pulled his undershirt up over his head and his long dong 
flopped down to his waist.

    "Holy shit!" she screamed.  "Let me see the rest!  Please!"

    Scared shitless for getting naked in front of this strange woman, 
he pulled his pants down and then his underpants.  At that, his dong 
flopped and unwound to his feet.

    "I'm in heaven!  I think I'm going to faint!" she gasped.  She 
waked up to him, raised her chin to his, and then asked, "Do you want 
the honors?"

    "Huh?  What do you mean?" he asked.

    "C'mon!  Don't keep a lady waiting!" she urged as she raised her 
arms straight up over her head and waited.

    In a flash of understanding, he lifted her white blouse and 
pulled it up over her head.  He could see her nipples rock-hard 
through her bra.  "That's next," she urged, catching his eye.

    "Uhm, how?" he asked.  

    "You don't know?" she exclaimed.

    "Uhm, no.  Sorry."

    She reached over her head and unsnapped her bra and handed it to 
him.  Then she kicked her shoes off, pulled her jeans down, and 
pulled her panties down and off.

    As he was standing there gawking at her, she finally pointed to 
the bed next to which they were standing and asked, "Is that your 

    "Yes," he answered and sat on it.

    She slid her butt over his legs and sat on his lap.  After the 
briefest hesitation, their lips met and began kissing and sucking and 
exploring each other's mouths with their tongues.  As they were 
kissing, he felt her grab his dong and knead it with her hand.  

    A few moments later, she pushed him down on the bed on his back, 
fell down on top of him, rolled to her side and pulled his mouth to 
one of her nipples.  

    Taking his cue, he began sucking on the nipple, making it even 
harder than it had been already.  A few minutes later, she pulled 
back and switched nipples.  

    A little after both her nipples had been well sucked, she crawled 
up to his head and swung a leg over his head.  Then she gently 
lowered her red muff onto his face, pressing her pussy tightly to his 
mouth.  "Suck my cunt!  Make me come!" she demanded.

    He had no idea what to do, so he started licking.  It tasted 
really gamy, and was really moist.  He stuck his tongue in one large 
opening that was drenched in wetness, then licked up until he came to 
a bump where the folds of skin seemed to come together. 

    "Oh yes!  Lick my clit!  Don't stop!"  

    He continued licking the lump that was, presumably, her clit.  He 
could feel himself getting harder and harder.  

    "Oh my God!" she yelled again.  "Your cock is doing an impression 
of the Saint Louis arch!"

    He could feel his cock so hard that it was jutting straight up 
from his pelvis and arching out over his legs and back down to the 
floor, where it went on to do a pretty good impression of a 
pressurized fire hose throbbing around the perimeter of the room.

    A moment later, as he continued licking and sucking her clit, she 
started bouncing and quaking while sitting on his face.  He continued 
sucking and licking until she finally fell forward on him.  

    "That was pretty good.  Now it's your turn."

    He was lying there under her, staring up at the ceiling from 
between her thighs with her cunt in his nose and her ass cheeks 
directly over his head.  

    Her face was staring right into his crotch and he felt her grab 
his cock and reel it in, all 30' of it, until she had the head of his 
cock in her hand.  

    "I've been told that I'm pretty good at taking it all down my 
throat, but this might be a challenge," she laughed. 

    _Oh my God!_ he thought as he felt her take the head of his cock 
into her mouth and swallow it.  She didn't stop either.  She 
continued sucking it in like a strand of spaghetti.  He felt his cock 
being swallowed deeper and deeper down her throat.  Minutes past as 
she continued swallowing it, deeper and deeper.  

    He could feel her throat muscles knead the section that had 
passed through her throat, finally triggering his explosive release.  

    He grunted and moaned as his cock throbbed, as wads of cum 
traversed its 30' length.  "Yeouch!" he yelped as he felt his cock's 
head enter her stomach with it's burning stomach acids.  

    _Maybe this isn't such a good idea._ he wondered silently to 
himself as she continued to suck it in, slowly, inch by inch.  He 
felt the pain fade as his cock's head passed through another tight 

    His breathing was getting heavier and heavier under the weight of 
her body on top of his as she relentlessly swallowed his cock deeper 
and deeper.

    _How deep can she take it?_ he wondered.  _There must be some 
limit to how far in it can go!_  

    Many more minutes passed as she continued to swallow it.  It felt 
to him like she has swallowed about half of it when she let out a 
noisy fart just above his face.

    "Hrry aouh hat!" she mumbled as the vibrations on his cock down 
her throat set him off again.

    Still more minutes passed, and she started farting more and more 
frequently.  He felt his cock being twisted and turned and squeezed 
especially near its head end as she continued to take it down her 

    Suddenly, John panicked when he saw her anus sphincter start to 
bulge and pucker.  _Oh God no!  Please don't shit on my face, bitch!_  
But a moment later, he saw the head of his cock emerge from her anus.  
The sensation was so bizarre because, for a moment, he felt his 
cock's head pass through such a tight sphincter, then emerge into 
cool air.   

    Still, she continued to suck and wallow it down her throat.  He 
could feel that she had almost reach the end where his cock was 
attached to his crotch.  The more she swallowed, the more oozed out 
of her asshole.  

    Then, he saw her hands reach from over her ass cheeks trying to 
grab his cock coming from her asshole.  Upon grabbing it, she seemed 
to be trying to push it down toward his face.  

    "Uhch we!  Uhch we!" she mumbled.

    Finally figuring out that she was trying to say, "fuck me," he 
reached up and grabbed his cock and pushed it into her pussy.

    The sensation, once again, made him explode.  His cum traversing 
down his cock, through her body and into her pussy, right before his 
eyes was an incredible sight that no other guy could ever have.  

    She finally swallowed it as far as she could, with her mouth 
pressed tightly against his crotch.  They lay like that for a long 
while until she then tried to reverse the procedure.

    However, that proved less than successful.  When she tried to 
pull her mouth away from his crotch and slide his cock back up her 
throat, she just yanked it with a "Yeowch!"

    She grabbed the end sticking out her ass, and tried to push it 
back up her ass while pulling her mouth away from his crotch.  The 
only result was that her asshole squeezed another two inches _out._

    They both spent the next few hours, rolling around the bed, one 
on top, then the other, struggling to push his cock back into her ass 
while pulling it out of her mouth.  All that effort accomplished 
nothing except to cause her to swallow a fraction of an inch _more_ 
into her mouth, forcing her mouth even more firmly against his 
crotch, and pushing another inch out her asshole.  

    Eventually, they both fell asleep exhausted.  John woke in the 
morning lying on top of her.  His crotch was pressed as tightly to 
her lips as before, maybe even more so. 

    "Ummmmhhhhh!  Ummmhhhh!" Kim hummed and waved her arms 
frantically with his cock still down her throat.  In her panic, she 
started gagging and choking, her body bucking wildly against him.  
"Kim!  Calm down!" he urged, leaning down and rubbing her shoulders 
and back.

    The sensations of her gagging on his cock were so intense that he 
came all over the floor between her legs.  Then she quickly regained 
her composure.  

    He said, "I'm sorry Kim.  I don't know what to do.  I'll call my 
doctor on Monday.  I don't know what else to tell you."

    She seemed to settle down at that, and so he went about his 
business the rest of the weekend -- making himself breakfast, 
catching a game on TV, surfing the internet, doing laundry, cleaning, 
sitting on the toilet, showering, and sleeping -- all while she was 
crawling around on her knees with her mouth plastered to his crotch. 

    One time, while he was standing in his kitchen, she started 
mumbling and waving her arms.  "I don't know what you're trying to 
tell me, Kim."

    A moment later, he felt her anus sphincter squeeze his cock as it 
had been doing regularly, then he felt the strangest sensation 
against where his cock emerged from her anus. 

    He smelled it a second later.  She had taken a shit on the floor.  
Squeezing her shit out her asshole around his sock.

    "Shit!" he exclaimed, then went to his broom closed and got out a 
brush and pan and mop to pick it up and drip it in the toilet and 
clean the floor.  After that, he allowed her to squat in the bathtub 
a few times each day to pee and shit. 

    Monday morning, he called his doctor who had been a close family 
friend since he was a baby and who was familiar with his birth 
defect, and explained his predicament.  The doctor came over that 
afternoon and examined the two of them.

    After examining them, the doctor explained, "There's no much I 
can do to separate the two of you without some severe consequences 
for one or both of you."

    "Like what?" he asked.    

    "Well, I can amputate your penis at your groin and let her 
swallow and pass it."

    "No way!" he shouted.

    "Or I can surgically remove it from her.  But that would mean 
cutting her open from her chin to her crotch, removing her stomach 
and intestines and laying them out straight, and then slicing her 
digestive tract apart and removing it from around your penis.  
Unfortunately, that would be fatal for her, I'm afraid."

    "No!  You can kill her either!  She's the closest I've ever came 
to having a girlfriend!"

    "Quite right.  Causing her death is out of the question."

    "What's left, then?" he asked the doctor.

    "Remain connected," the doctor answered.

    "Stay connected?  Like Siamese twins?"

    "Exactly," the doctor insisted.  "I'll be right back."  He went 
out to his van and returned a moment later with some medical 

    The doctor gave John a box of adult diapers, saying, "You can 
have her wear these diapers, or you can just let her do her business 
in the bathtub a few times a day as you've been doing.  Whatever 
works for you."

    "Okay," John answered

    He set some IV bags and some off looking needles on the table, 
saying, "You'll need to feed her intravenously, here's how."

    The doctor showed him how to inject her with the IV needle and 
give her an IV drip, saying, "She won't pass solid waste any more, 
but she'll urinate very frequently."

    "I see," John answered.

    "That's about it.  I'll bring you a supply of IV bags each week.  
Call me if you have any questions or problems."

    "Thanks, Doc," He answered.   

    After the doctor left, he said to Kim, "Sorry Kim, but I guess 
your body is a permanent extension of my cock, now."

    He went over to sit at his computer to write his next week's 
column.  He still had to earn a living.

    - END -