Recently, when responding to a query in the off-topic forum by a Mac user about moving to "the dark side", one of our more vocal PC users took the opportunity to rubbish the Mac. Of course, my platform of choice being the basis for my BEA handle, I defended my beloved computer against these attacks, and predictably, a largely pointless "platform war" ensued. Such "debates" are usually about as fruitful as those discussing religion; indeed, some of us (admittedly myself included) treat our computer platform as a kind of religion. Rarely does one side have enough understanding of the other to argue effectively; for example, the PC user in question argued that PCs were better because they now had built-in networking, when Macs have had it for well over a decade! Also, our points of view are necessarily coloured by what we like to do with our machines; for instance, said PC user stated that he hated Macs because not enough of the games he liked were ported to it, but why should that make Macs "suck" (in his words) for those of us who don't have any interest in these games? Still, there's nothing inherently wrong with any of this if we don't take it too personally, but unfortunately, my spirited defense of the Mac led this PC user to proclaim that he disliked me personally.

Which brings me to the subject of my column: what do we all come to the BEA for? To decide we hate a person simply because they prefer a different computer platform than ourselves? Come on! This is the BEA: in case some of you have forgotten, those initials stand for Breast Expansion Archive. In other words, we're supposed to come here to look at big tits -- a shared interest which in theory should unite us, not divide us. Of course, there will always be disputes over various things among such a large group of people; indeed, to a point I believe this is a healthy thing. As stated in my last column, I feel it is the responsibility of those who manage the BEA to resolve these disputes when they get out of hand. But why should any of us hate each other in a community that has a common, non-violent, and non-political interest? Should a place such as this really be taken that seriously?

Worst of all are those who take these disputes so seriously that they decry the entire BEA for them. Take the recent departure of R&D, for example. Now personally, I believe this actually has a lot more to do with the presence of BEhavior than anything else, but Corinne Meadowlark (whoever she actually is) has gone on record stating that she wanted to give the BEA a "jolt". Once again, I believe the seriousness of the past disputes here are in part the responsibility of the BEA's management. However, I also believe it is mostly because the sheer size of this community greatly increases the probability of there being something to disagree on. If Alicia posted the way she does here to any other site like this one, I'm sure she would have sparked exactly the same sort of debate. As Corinne readily admits, there are many good people here, which I believe constitute the vast majority. Yet she is ready to rubbish the entire BEA and disadvantage the entire site for the sins of the few -- I fail to see how this makes her any better than they are. Indeed, by doing this she is guilty of exactly what she accuses them of: taking these disagreements too seriously. If you disagree with something or some one here, fine; state your case -- just don't put down the entire BEA for it.

You may recall that in my first posts to the BEA forum I considered myself something of an outsider, frustrated by the lack of acceptance of my opinions by the BEA "in-crowd". But I persisted, believing that reason would have to win out in the end, which indeed it has done. Now I write for BEhavior, allowing me to voice my opinions as I see fit, sparking debate which hopefully will change the BEA for the better. And this, I believe, is the way to try and resolve the disagreements here -- simply rubbishing the BEA and taking your business elsewhere can only be counterproductive, IMHO.

This is especially true of those other big breast related sites who love to knock the BEA at every opportunity. For goodness sake people, we're all in this together! Let's put aside all this ludicrous "my big tit site is better than your big tit site" rubbish, and instead try to identify the reasons for our disagreements so that we are in a position to resolve them -- running away from them certainly won't work. And for goodness sake, don't take everything so personally and seriously! You might not like what another person says, but that doesn't mean you have to attack them personally, and it certainly doesn't mean you have to hate them. In the immortal words of John Cage from Alley McBeal, "say it with me, people": let's all just enjoy the tits!