BACKSTAGE INTERLUDE: ANOTHER WRAP

Unending BE - episode 290348

Stage manager: Fade out, logo, and--cut. Well done, people, take five. (Whispering:) Okay, Dave, 'port those Authors out of here!

Writer: Go to sleep, Characters.

They go to sleep, Jim and Sharon in mid-stroke. The writer 'ports those Authors out of here.

Writer: Okay, you can wake up. Don't fret about where they went, they had to bug out, doing a bar mitzvah later.

The Characters wake up.

Jim: We're done? I can get out of this stupid bug suit?

Sharon: No way, I'm not done, start pumping again, buster, I'm almost there....

Pamela: What? Around impressionable young 'uns?

Sharon: Impressionable young 'uns my ass, you obviously weren't passed up by the titty-fairy!

Pamela (preening): Thanks for noticing.

Sharon, and for that matter Jim, are, however, beyond noticing. The more polite members of the crew look discretely away. The remainder stare avidly at the woman getting off on the centipede.

Writer: Well, I'll be going, then. Nice to see the operation, SM, we'll have to do it again sometime.

Stage manager (muttering): Only if they pay us time and a half.

Exit Writer. Enter Oprah and Whoopi, stage right.

Oprah: Excuse me? Is this where they're shooting the Oreo commercial?

Script girl: Sorry, ladies, we're running a bit behind, and your co-star's a bit... busy at the moment.

Whoopi: So I see. Hey, are all these little girls in the com--ow!

Tina: Do little girls have tits like these? Call us that a second time and I'll kick you again!

Wilhelmina: You go, girl!

Stage manager: Midgets off the set! Jim! Sharon! Aren't you done yet?

Sharon: Ah. Ah. AH. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Script girl: I think she's done, chief.

Stage manager: Great. Sharon, you're outta here. Now, crew, strip Jim out of that centipede suit and bring in the cookie dough....

  1. *Stay with Jim, Oprah and Whoopi as they shoot the Oreo Commercial.

  2. Follow Sharon Backstage.

  3. Follow the midgets Backstage.

  4. Follow the Authors (except L.E., who, as you'll recall, wasn't here), as they're plunked back down into the Bar & Grill in the Concourse, all with pockets full of mana to spend.

  5. >Follow L.E. (who most certainly wasn't here), to the usual destination.

  6. Do something else.
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Tue Apr 22 22:58:34 2003

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