The Photograph-Guided Body-Resculpting Machine (PGBRM) and Rick

Unending BE - episode 252445

Someone who looked exactly like Jim in his usual form showed up very early at Sharon's place, well before her party. Sharon had taken the afternoon off (having worked overtime earlier in the week at the law firm where she was a junior partner) to prepare for the party. Of course, it was really Rick, transmogrified by the Photograph-Guided Body-Resculpting Machine (or PGBRM), which was now in one of several boxes that he was carrying. He'd parked his car a block and a half away so that Sharon wouldn't see it, and he was annoyed at the relative weakness and flabbiness of his Jim form.

"Jim!" said Sharon, as she opened the door to Rick.

"Happy birthday, darling!" said Rick in his Jim voice; he put down his stack of boxes, and embraced Sharon; they shared a long, deep kiss. The transformation had given Rick some of Jim's memories and a copy of his personality, and the longer he stayed Jim, the more he seemed able to use those to improve his impersonation, he was finding.

The fake Jim took Rick's new digital camera from one of the boxes, and said, "Now for some photos of the birthday girl -- nothing formal, just relax!" Sharon stuck her tongue out at him playfully, and he snapped a picture of her like that, then a few of her laughing, then a few in some playful poses. Rick put down the camera and opened another box and took out a felt-covered jewelery box. "Happy birthday again," he said, handing Sharon the jewelry box, and as she opened it, Rick took from a sealed bag a cloth he had saturated with chloroform, and he covered her mouth and nose with it. What with Jim's wimpy body, it was a near thing, but eventually he had Sharon unconscious without too much damage to his Jim form -- which he knew would soon not matter.

Rick left the unconscious Sharon on the floor, and got out the PGBRM and set it up on Sharon's kitchen table. Then, again annoyed at his Jim-body's weakness, Rick dragged Sharon to her kitchen and propped her body up on a kitchen chair with the PGBRM pointed at her. He got out two of his pet-store purchases: one was a complete setup for a hamster or gerbil or such small animal, a plastic cage and enough food and supplies to get started, the other a book on hamsters. With his Jim fingers he flipped through the pages until he found a picture of a rare variety of hamster, apparently asleep. He tore it out and took it and the hamster cage to the kitchen.

The rest was predictable: with the picture from the book in the PGBRM, the machine swiftly turned Sharon into a hamster, which Rick caught and put in the cage. Then Rick got out his laptop and portable color printer, downloaded the pictures of Sharon from his digital camera, and printed out his favorite. Then he put the printout in the PGBRM, sat where he had put Sharon, and hit the RESCULPT button.

  1. But nothing happened! Maybe it doesn't work on digital photos? But then how come it worked with the equally "articifial" halftone picture of that hamster?
  2. *In moments, Rick's Jim form and clothes had become Sharon's of just a few minutes before. The new Sharon laughed manically and hugged herself.
  3. Rick's Jim form changed, but not into Sharon's...
  4. Something else happened...
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latex fish

Sat Sep 21 07:34:54 2002