"Honored members," Lurch called. "I regret to inform you that our scheduled speaker of the evening has called in ill. He and his topic must unfortunately be postponed to another time. However, he has kindly recruited a guest lecturer, who has agreed to introduce and moderate a topic that has been on a number of members' minds of late -- the question of whether or not to institute an AddVenture version of the Academy Awards."
At this there was a general movement in the direction of the seating, and a number of absent members 'ported in, along with quite a few non-members who had quickly cadged guest invitations from those who were. Even some whose avatars were occupied elsewhere were interested enough to attend, despite the havok it wreaked on what passed for continuity in the AddVenture.
"Our guest speaker this evening," Lurch went on, "is known to many of you as an expert in communications and a knowledgable resource on the Backstage in general. While he has a long way to go before he can be considered as a member of this Club, I'm sure we are all grateful to him for his willingness to appear at such short notice, and that you will join me in welcoming... The Operator." Lurch extended a hand to the right side of the stage and started to edge in the other direction, unfortunately colliding with the Operator on the way, who hadn't known he wasn't supposed to come on from the left. There was a titter of laughter from the Audience.
"Sorry, Lurch," said the Op, helping the creature pick himself up. "I appreciate the introduction. You're much more articulate than your model, I must say."
"Thank you," Lurch replied. "I've been taking night courses."
The Operator took the podium. "Assembled members," he began. "I have been called in tonight as an uninvolved observer to moderate the Awards discussion. As you presumably know, the topic was originally raised by L.E., apparently holed up elsewhere at present, in an inter-club memo to Dabbler. Projector, please?"
The curtain behind him rolled back to reveal a blank screen, upon which an excerpt from L.E.'s memo was projected.
An InterClub Memo... (source episode 151815):
...I'm writing to you from the 200-plus Club. (Guess who's not eligible...and we'll keep amending to make sure it stays that way). Glad to see you respect number of episodes written. ... what would you think of the idea of awards for best episode,plot,character,etc? (The Eppies?)
Already, there was a hand raised in the audience. The Operator pointed to the Author raising it. "Yes?" he asked. Roy Del Frink, you have a question?"
Frink (source episode 151856) nodded. "I like the Eppies idea," he said, "but what's all this about a 200-Plus Club? Do we really need a club devoted exclusively to L.E.? Doesn't it kind of defeat the purpose of clubs to have a club of one?"
Behind the Operator, the wording on the slide being projected suddenly changed. It now read:
200 is not 2800 (source episode 151875).
The 200-plus Club would have a whole bunch of members. If I wanted one for myself alone, it would be the 2800-plus club. Not that I mind magnificent isolation from time to time...
L.E.
Frink looked puzzled. The Operator, unaware of the change, pointed to another member. "Yes? Zorlond, would you like to answer Roy's question?"
"Well," said Zorlond (source episode 151876), "Looks like L.E.'s already covered that, but I'm not sure Roy understands the answer. Just re-read what he wrote, Roy. Two-hundred plus, not two-thousand, L.E.'s written way more than you seem to think. So have a lot of other people, which means there are quite a few members -- twenty-seven, according to Adama's lists. Dunno who he's trying to exclude, he's got running feuds with most of them... But even if it was a typo, and he did originally mean 2800, who the hell cares if LE has a 'private club'? Anyway, to get back to the lecture topic, I think the idea of awards for best episode is good, but the name isn't. I'd suggest calling them the Golden T awards (T's for short). What do other members think?"
As the Operator tried to choose between several hands, the projected slide changed yet again:
Levelling Notes (source episode 151877):
As noted otherwise, the 200-plus Club would not be a club of one.
L.E.
"Yes, JigSaw?" the Operator said. "Odd, I thought you were a girl, currently."
"Yeah," said JigSaw (source episode 151881), but that avatar's in play elsewhere right now, so I thought I'd just slip on the old bod so's I could add to the fooferaw. "Ts, eh? Hmmm... Me, I think the idea of awards for the best episodes, characters, and basic plots is interesting but I think it could easily start a flame war for example, some one votes for so and so's episode and someone responds to it 'what you liked that lump of shit'....so on and so on. It's basically a good idea, but I don't see it working as part of the adventure it self, maybe on the Plume or if somebody really wants to take on the job of reseving E mail votes and then sending the results to Adama to put in the index. Of course it would mean I would have to sign on to the plume and stop lurking, don't know how I feel about that. Maybe Im wrong but we have seen flames start over less, why invite it." Once again L.E.'s slide changed.
Award Concepts... (source episode 151902):
Well, no way in the world will I join the Plume or any other "must register to post" web board. "Eppie" was intended as an abbreviation of "Episode," in case you were suspicious it meant anything else. In any event, the award presentation ceremonies would make sense as part of the DVd-Backstage (I would of course send a stunning Character to accept on my behalf, should I win...I expect both Authors and Characters would be eligible for awards, and present at the ceremonies. Hosted by Jim?)
L.E.
"Is there something going on here I don't know about?" the Operator asked, as several members started tittering again. (There's a lot of tittering in the BE AddVenture. Other kinds of laughter just don't fit in as well, somehow...) Several hands pointed behind him, and he turned and read L.E.'s note. "Oh," he said, "I see. Well, that's one way around the non-appearance thing. I just hope he doesn't take umbrage against the projectionist for hijacking and recycling his statements into this episode."
"Actually," some one said, "maybe it's the rest of us you should be worrying about. There seem to be a lot of statements getting recycled here, not only that, but edited as well..."
The Operator shrugged. "That was speaking out of turn. Please raise your hand if you want to be recognized. "Yes, gyoza, I believe."
"Right," said gyoza (source episode 151935). "I just wanted to point out that if people really can't bring themselves to use the Plume, we could take the topic outside! Maybe it should be discussed on the Celebrity MC addventure forum conveniently findable on Adama's links page. That way, totally gratuitous discussions like this one which advance absolutely nothing can be kept off the Addventure. That's all I wanted to say, I'm going to go back and reread episode 2 now..." gyoza disappeared.
"Yes?" said the Operator. "The gentleman with the blurry outline? I'm not sure I know you, mister--?"
The man with the blurry outline stood up. "Dabbler," he said. "Or maybe you should call me 'da Blur' in this form..."
There was a collective groan of the type Dabbler liked to elicit. "Whatever floats your boat," said the Operator, impatiently. "This is rather unusual for you, isn't it?"
"Yes, but I'm using my normal avatar elsewhere like JigSaw is, and since I don't want to foul up what passes for continuity I thought I'd just lift DVd's blurry-edged body for the duration. Serves him right for swiping my option in the original version of this discussion. My view on the Eppie/T Awards (source episode 151936) is that I like the idea of 'awards for best episode, plot, character, etc.' I just think, along with some of the other speakerss, that it would be unworkable. Maybe I'm wrong. If the powers that be can figure out a way to make it fair, effective, and flame-proof, I'm all for it. On the other hand, an awards banquet, even if it never actually got to the awards part, would offer a dandy scenario for a Backstage thread, as I think someone mentioned. Oh, and I'm glad L.E. clarified what he meant by 'Eppies,' I kinda figured it was from episode but also wondered if it was a sly dig at FCF and his 'Epstein' fixation. Me, I like 'Ts' better. And, not that I'm into watersports, but wouldn't it be interesting if the best episode for that sort of thing qualified for the 'Wet Ts' award? (I expect to hear a collective groan, here...)"
He got it, and sat down, grinning.
As if in response, the projected slide altered another time:
Wet T? (source episode 151991)
As for calling them "Ts"...well, I suppose the statuette could be of a woman with T-cup sized breasts (not teacup-sized breasts!!). And the ladies on stage who brought the statuettes out to the presenters might have bare T-cup-sized breasts. But "Eppie" sounds more like Oscar/Emmy/Tony/Grammy etc. True enough that there would be practical problems.
L.E.
"The floor is open for further discussion," the Operator said.
Go back - Go to the parent episode.
Tue Jun 12 15:17:35 2001
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