There was no phone number, but a call to Directory Enquiries soon solved that, and Sharon rang the number she had been given. She got a shock when the call was answered. Before she could say anything, the slightly oriental-sounding voice at the far end said: "Hello, Sharon. Dr Wu here."
"How did you know who I was?" Sharon asked in surprise.
"From my metaphysical researches, I have learnt to do many things that the ill-informed might term paranormal or even magical," Dr Wu replied.
"Meaning that you aren't going to tell me how you did it," Sharon said.
"No," Wu responded. Sharon thought that there was an amused tone to his voice. He went on: "But I don't need metaphysics to tell me why you rang me. Jim will have received my little presents this morning, and naturally he will have passed them on to you. You will have been mightily indignant, but you will have taken the breasts and vibrator anyway, and as soon as you got home you will have tried them out."
Sharon was taken aback by this eerily accurate description of events. "How could you possibly know that?" she asked.
"Because, dear Sharon, I know just what a slut you are behind that prim and proper exterior."
Sharon nearly slammed the phone down, but she quickly brought her anger under control. Dr Wu was probably the only person who could undo what had happened to her, and she couldn't afford to antagonise him. Besides, he's right, isn't he? a little voice said at the back of her mind.
"What I am is no concern of yours," she said.
"I see. So I take it from that that you must be happy with your new breasts, and being foam rubber on the inside and white plastic on the outside. That's good news. I'll say goodbye then."
"Wait!" Sharon almost screamed into the receiver. "You know that's not what I meant." In a quieter voice, she continued: "Can you help me? Please?"
Mon Jul 22 04:55:59 2002